Dealing With Difficult Meditation Experiences

Mildly difficult experiences in meditation can be processed much like everything else, i.e. be curious and allow the experience to be what it is without resistance.

But some experiences may be so challenging or overwhelming that at least temporarily they cannot be dealt with by surrender.

The traditional advice is something like this:  switch to single-pointed concentration practice or loving-kindness practice, if you can.  This is often more calming.  If that isn't providing relief, then maybe stop meditating altogether.  Do some things to ground oneself:  maybe get out in some fresh air, walk around, eat some hearty food, watch a movie, etc.  Talk to people, talk to a psychologist.

Although the ideas are similar, Lost in Oblivion – An Exploration of Adverse Meditation Experiences goes into more depth, exploring many suggestions such as the following:

• Significantly reduce your practice time
• See a professional
• Focus on life goals and values
• Reduce self-focus
• Try some different meditative approaches
• Rotate between meditation and thinking
• Working with a blank mind
• Working with relaxation induced anxiety
• Movement can be incredibly powerful
• Practice Gratitude and other more ‘cognitive’ practices
• Reading novels and enjoyable literature, and engagement in enjoyable hobbies
• Join your community, and find connection
• Be kind to yourself, don’t just sit through emotional adversity
• Exposure and response prevention can be useful

Bilateral Breath Meditation

If you're having trouble staying aware with your breath meditation, there are simple options like counting the breaths, or using a mantra or noting practice that is synchronized with the breath.

But it's nice to have a nonverbal technique.  Part of what we're pointing at in meditation is our fundamental experience prior to language, concepts, or narrative.  Like maybe a dog might look at the world.  A nonverbal technique can help with that.

My recommendation is to do something along the lines of lightly pressing a left finger into your left thigh as you inhale, and then release that pressure and lightly press your right finger into your right thigh as you exhale.  And continue, in an alternating, bilateral, pressing and releasing that is synced up with the breath.

That's the suggestion.  You can use your fingers, thumbs, whatever.  You can press on your body, the couch, your clasped hands, whatever.  Just a continuous pressure with the finger/thumb of one hand for the inhale, and the opposite side for the exhale.  While walking I noticed an effective way to do it was to press the first and second fingers together while alternating hands as usual.  While driving pressing thumbs on the steering wheel.  Etc.

You can also stack techniques if you need to.  Sometimes we need more to do to keep ourselves focused on the present.  So you could do this practice, paying attention to the breath with the alternating pressure, and you could add a mantra or noting practice on top of that.